Wanted: Sleep

I am prepared to give up all my stilettos, chocolate, and maybe even my Blackberry for one night/morning/afternoon of terror free sleep. The last month worth of emotions, events and work stress have flooded me in the silence of my half empty house. In honor of all the subconscious adventures I have decided to form a new dream definitions

1. Gaspers: These are the bolt upright type dreams - had a lovely one this morning when the sound of the walking and door opening above me in my early morning pseudo sleep sounded like it was right next to me - of course I had my back to the bedroom door - so it was more like a twist and fall out of bed - I'm smooth that way - terrify the intruder with a flailing chaotic exit from bed.

2. Bella-itis: This happened Thursday/Friday and Saturday night - blessed... they are the nights of one hour at a time sleep, drifting into a sea of non-differentiated emotions, but all cause this fear of sleeping, lest I find myself in the same sea of fear, pain, tears, anger and uncertainty... best described as all Bella did in New Moon - sleep and scream in the abyss. Dramatic true, maybe overly so, but we all have these everyone once and a while - mine had a lovely up side, as I don't know if my closet, house and kitchen cupboards have been so organized, I accomplished ironing, mending, and laundry in the middle of the night, who knew those hours could be so productive when you refuse to sleep.

3. Non-sleep: In the fighting off of sleep and Lady Exhaustion, you can get the point where I have been the last day and night, the inability to sleep regardless of how tired you are. There is no comfort in sleep, and the desire to have someone there comes sneaking up out of the fog. I don't know where it really came from, but last night I would have given my Starbucks addiction for AB to hold me until I fell asleep. Not productive and I referencing the giving up Starbucks, and also not fair for AB - he can't be expected to do that.

4. The Crazy NLLL dreams - like my lovely uterus occupant dream last week, which to be honest I think started this whole nuttiness.

Photo:http://www.flickr.com/photos/kirstielei/3867896862/