Sunday, September 06, 2009

How Do I Say This?

Blogging is bad for my health, and texting is even worse. I came to the realization as I typed this blog out once already, that despite everything I promised myself I would never do, I did what BI tried so hard to convince me to do, to jump. All along I have thought that somewhere in everything I had held on to that ledge, that I had guarded my heart, somewhere, in some moment I despite what I could sense, jumped anyways. With no one to catch you, no parachute, no safety net, nothing, the ground is hard, it's brutal and it's a reminder that despite what was said last night, and not denied, that no amount of waiting is ever going to inspire AB to jump.

Maybe even sadder I can't stomach Aapa and Momo - it's too much oddly enough, some day I might come back to them, honestly for some reason I can't see that happening.

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