Fractures

TOITB has got me thinking about breakups. Mine have fallen into two categories, which I realize are obvious dumper and dumpy... but let me explain how they aren't obvious.

Category 1 - I dumped their complicated asses

First boyfriend - moved away to law school and while we should have ended it then - he cheated as part of his "removal of moral resistance to the acts necessary to be a good lawyer" - apparently if he could cheat on his girlfriend he would be okay with drinking and regurgitating redbulls and vodka in the law library etc... classy. This song was on the radio at the time - appropriate given his behaviour afterwards. I tried to go the classy route - I shoved all his stuff in a box, moved with that box and 3 years later when BI came on the scene burned everything except the prize t-shirt which I mailed to him in Houston.

First Fiance - He didn't cheat, but what the hell else didn't he do... let's just say being classy wasn't part of this deal, it was a get out alive and with as minimal life altering as necessary.

Obviously I don't know how to let them down gently, or find the kind who will behave...

Category 2 - this is the sorry tale of my life pseudo dating and then giving my blessing when I get replaced.

1.BWPAG (Boy Who Plays a Guitar) followed Lawyer boy - and he on a Transatlantic flight explained that he could only marry a nurse or a elementary school teacher. So there you have it folks you know two jobs I can not and will not do. This lack of vocational desire meant to BWPAG despite our chemistry/pseudo dating I would be a shitastic mother and wife, apparently a year after this moment he thought me worthy for a second go 'round let's just say I didn't. I forgot to mention one of my close friends who he had no feelings towards apparently fit the bill, she was a nurse - so of course I gave my blessing...

2. My Mr Big aka the Dr. We spent hours and hours with each other etc and etc - pseudo dating the story of my life - my boss/his coworker though we were dating for months and then lo and behold one of my coworkers tells me that they're dating and she wanted to break it to me - hmmm, interesting. So I did what I firmly believe I always should do, be classy, given fake but glowing acceptance speech and then let my friends say whatever they want in regards to the situation. Let's ignore that he came to my convocation etc.

3. BI doesn't really count - I loved him, but I guess in the end I wasn't in love with him and he's happier now because he's with someone who is long term more compatible, let's just say as a whole it still kinda sucks, to be so close, yet so far away - and no that isn't a fake glowing yadda yadda speech.

Yep there are likely others I left off all the online related scuffles that all fit under the first category - oh lord - no online dating for this little girl - it's a tragic scene.