Things You Say When You Know You Don't Want to Say Them Again...

Maybe it's cliche, maybe it is the thing you do when you know things are different. AB texted me that he was worried that he makes me suffer. Maybe he does. Since I was away I realized we are no longer even the friends we once were - we don't talk, we don't do a lot of things. It's the absence of those things that make me nostalgic for whatever we had in the summer. But time moves on and things change. So before I have completely moved myself out of his life as quietly as I have had to out of his place in the morning, I said it. Apparently all it warranted was a smiley face, despite his drunk admission less than a month back. I didn't think it would garner anything else, but that's not why I said it anyways. I said it because I realize that when I should have said it I haven't, even if it would have been completely random or out of the blue. I could have said it to BI and never did, not that that matters now. I should have said it to the Dr. too. Each for their own reasons. I shouldn't have said it to Lawyer Boy or CEF for the same reason - it was said because it seemed right for the context, for the flow of the storyline.

So deep breath time to start clearing everyone off the slate for a while. That includes dragging Ms. J to see DB, avoiding BB and keeping a safe distance from everyone.