Monday, August 03, 2009

The Crying Nights

Last night was the shits, I tried submitting a paper online for a class and between my borrowed computer, slow "High Speed" internet and a online program that almost crashed - lovely what your tuition gets you, in the end it didn't go through, the deadline passed and I technically have a 0 on a 40% paper. Cheers all around. So here's the thing, I cried, and yet I hated myself for crying since I've cried to much this year and then I realized. I was even worse than all those times this year, I was crying alone, eww. Crying alone about useless things that cannot be changed is a frustrating and unfortunate feeling and all I wanted was someone I could call up, have drop by or drop in on. And yet AB and BV are just not the people BI was, to the point I wonder if you get a second time round with that kind of set up, the best friend you grow to trust and care for and then find yourself realizing there is something much more going on? Or no. Well enough of all that, it is morning and time for coffee, antiaging creams to fix last nights unfortunate face contortions and more educational pursuits towards my benefit... finals!

2 comments:

  1. Absolutely nothing wrong with crying by yourself. We all do it. And it's probably the best kind of crying because then no one sees you with snot drooling down your face, eyes all puffed out and hears your dreadful sobbing noises that sound like a dying cat. It always works out in the end (well... most of the time), and then we look back on it and laugh, thinking how inconsequential the cause of the tears was in the whole big scheme of things.
    Hope you're feeling better.
    Thanks for checking out our blog :)

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  2. Well, chin up kid, you don't want to encourage one of those premature wattles!

    And yes, all have done it. I remember once declaring love and ending up leaning against my 1962 Ford Fairlane, arm around my dog, and crying. We did stay together for the rest of the summer anyway, until she went back to school in the fall and dropped the hammer for real.

    So, shit happens, and all we can do is wipe off and wait for the next installment, all the while getting by with a little help from our friends.

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