Have you have ever met someone who intimidated you - not CEF intimidation, but a wow you're amazing, you're so _____.... I had a conversation with a male friend about this. This friend is not the only guy to do this to me, DD was the other once but considering my mouth goes bone dry in his presence I have given up trying on that. I've always sort of believed that it was a good sign - not the bone dry mouth - but the element of awe. I am not talking about a disproportionate amount, but rather the person having abilities you don't have and want or want to grow in, someone who compliments you, encourages you to grow.
For example - I cannot dance and I cannot get up in front of people and do anything let alone sing or play an instrument. I have sung in front of hundreds in another language too - but let me put it this way I probably looked like I was going to hurl the entire time. The lack of dancing is probably a combination of insecurity and coming from a family where dancing was verboten - especially dancing with a boy. It didn't help me one bit that I went from a public elementary school where dancing consisted of standing holding each other at a respectable distance and moving side to side to a private school where no one danced because everyone knows that dancing leads to sex. Actually a lot leads to sex and it isn't just dancing... sigh - to bad they didn't consider all the other ways and teach some practical instruction around that... but that is another blog. So bottom line I dance at home with the blinds closed and no one else around...
Those aren't things I necessarily want to grow in but I do want to find someone who supports me and challenges me to grow... I don't know if someone who intimidates me is the place to start though apparently I have the same effect on men - so maybe I need to get over my fears in order to find someone brave enough to handle me - rather than dealing with the men who think they can just corral me.
Hmmmm puking in public...I sneezed a massive snotball on my hands during communion @ church when I was a kid. Then I had to put out said snot hand to the priest so he can place the host on it. Disgusted + mortified = me. I feel your pain.
ReplyDeleteI think the one time you sang in front of people in another language I was present (Poy Aleluha Gosbudu), and I think you have danced in my presence too, but that may be because of : coffee, lack of sleep, alcohal or the giggles !
ReplyDeleteYou were there on those 3 or was it 4 services - but it was Boy with the Guitar, S and Me singing with the band - Hallelujah Your Love is Amazing and Your Love is Deep translated - I had to dig out the translation I still have to verify that... it's been 7 years.
ReplyDeleteAnd I am sure I danced in your presence - we did live together for a year and you will always be my favoritest roommate. No one else cuddles, laughs, sings or is as full of joy as you were and are.