Musings from the world of pseudo-dates, man-children, booze and the third year of graduate school
Friday, December 09, 2011
Love Me For Me
Directory boy and I have still been messaging - but every time I send a message, I remember that this song reflects my life - there are those who stay and there are those who run. And while I have been very intentional in keeping my personal story for face to face conversation. I am reminded that X loves me regardless of me and my story- and I know that if we aren't meant to be in the grand scheme of things, the thing I question more than all that is if I am prepared to go through the process again of walking someone through loving me. I almost feel like instead of this blog I need to start writing a book on how to love someone who has been broken by life. All our stories are unique but there are definitely some days where I just want to say to everyone - man and woman - yes I have dark uglies in my life, but they have names (abuse, rape, mental illness) and they know their place (submission - they don't control my life) - so what's it to you - why does it mean you can't like me or love me? All of the things that have broken me did not happen to you - they are not yours to carry - so if you liked me or loved me before you knew why have you stopped?
I may just have found my book topic after all these years - wow was not expecting to stumble across it while studying for my OT final - I wonder if that means I need to give my prof credit.
Labels:
directoryboy,
lifeissocomplicated,
x
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Wow.
ReplyDeleteWell I love you, but it's not the same, I know. lol