Men are...

a simple mystery

a complex simplicity

or something like that, because time after time they do things relationship wise and I find myself going, yep that seems about right, especially when it comes to getting into serious relationships. It seems for many (not all) that a serious relationship is the only logical step when transitioning into or out of a big life change.

Let's take RB for example - last summer he was the sort of dating and sort of like someone mumbling fool. This winter semester, the busiest one of his life and the last one for him - he decides to take on a very serious relationship with lightening speed and fierce determination. I know in many ways, since I'm not in the relationship it is not fair to say this, but looking at them (and others) I wonder if men need to have their support networks locked in before stepping into or out of a tough place.

Many of my male classmates got married in the months leading up to starting graduate school, and I know it wasn't their intention to have it sound like this but often it came across not a decision of relationship timing, like it was good for both of us, as much it was, well of course she's coming with me. Yes because you're not able to function without her? I know that's sweet for some but in some regards when I look at the single women who have packed up and moved across countries on their own, I wonder if we're either afraid and we hide it well during transitions or if some point in our conditioning or just as our society has changed we've just grown accustomed to doing things on our own.

Not that I want to rehash this but heck I did the opposite when starting graduate school, I exited a relationship knowing that I needed the space, and as much as that decision pains me at times, and it seriously does, I know that I wouldn't have felt it fair to make the choice I made to change my degree or my life path.

And in that maybe that's where men and women are different. I know that's a gross generalization, but it seems to be the events lived out - which means.... I'm going to have to find a man doing at two year degree starting in September, casually friend him and hope in a year from now when that fear of what shall I do kicks in I'll be around and poof, instant husband.

If for one second you thought I am being serious, rest assured I was/am not. Life's out there and I would like a partner but I don't need one, so no sense loitering around in the hopes of that.

I know the song doesn't relate but it still fills me with so much joy to have been apart of it.



PS - Mr. Brilliant who I do not think got added to the Blog Boys is off the market - good for him, seriously because it wouldn't have been me.