Change of Plans

Lawyer and Guy and I didn't seem to be on the same page and we don't have the same schedule because his parents are in town, but for whatever reason he's found my soft spot or a lonely spot or a something spot because on Saturday night when he texted me to see if I could come out last minute, we ended up making plans for a late movie last night  as I'd been in the Hunger Games with AE that evening.

So he came to the door this time, it was a little awkward, I wanted to hug him, I would hug everyone else, I guess I just felt/feel if you're going to play the role of the man I feel a little awkward being the one advancing the physical aspects of the relationship. But anyways. He picked me up and for the first time I got to run the conversation. In the theatre I sat as close as I could, they sure don't make that easy. So we were shoulder to shoulder and this time no panic. As we walked out of the theatre he took my hand, *FINALLY* it was nice. You know in our culture obsessed with sex I continue to see that we miss out on all the nice, comforting touch that is long before anyone gets sweaty or clothes are removed. I took his arm on the way out of the car to the door, and then there was that awkward, what now dance. Like what should I do? So I offered a hug and got that and a peck on the cheek. It was sweet. I should have have just kissed him.

So what did I do I garnered up the courage to ask him out this weekend. I have zero time and he has his parents, but whatever. Bring it on let's see where this goes.

So about tequila

I have decided when it's mixed with coconut rum and lime juice it makes a very potent but fabulous drink. Two of those later and I was having a warm all over feeling... maybe warm enough to the idea that this year is a year for getting my shit together more than it will be about getting into a relationship.

See here's the inside track on my life - I have one degree completed and another almost complete and those are incredibly long stories in and of themselves. Needless to say I realized over the Christmas holiday that I have some dreams I need to pursue to their end - whether anything becomes of them or not. Graduate school - primarily a PhD is the very end goal. I have a plan and I have a game plan to get Ms. J to come with me, in theory. She wants her PhD too, just in a completely different program, and being that we are compatible studiers I figure why not press each other onto our respective goals... so this year includes quitting work - and I've ALWAYS worked since I was 15. Going to school full time (20 credits left and one audited English class), writing the GRE which if it is anything like the MCAT I might just shoot myself, and last but not least apply for the top 7 of my area American schools and 3 Canadian schools, the UNPeace school, and two non-profit related MBA type programs. Now why you might ask, well I don't want to waste a year, I want options and I know that while the later aren't my first choice I do still find those areas fascinating and I know I need to be practical...

So will there be boys on the agenda. This is S&P we are discussing, there will ALWAYS be boys on the agenda, question is if it's just about the looking or more.

Tonight's music selection from An Education, an amazing beautiful movie and Duffy is fabulous, see her in concert if you can.

How to Update Y'all...

I've been pondering over it for a while and since I haven't had access to a computer during the moments when I've really wanted to blog, thus things have been mushed together, and now folks is the grand moment I search for the string to unravel the mess.

It maybe no surprise to some, but AB and I have slipped into what Ms. J calls a "platonic dating relationship.*" AB indicated earlier this week that he enjoyed our talks, then last night we got into a discussion about letting things come to fruition in relationships or just spitting them out there and letting the pieces fall where they may. He indicated while he's normally an all out there kind of person when it comes to matters of the heart, he still waits to make sure the other person's heart is there too - well I'll give him some slack even though that doesn't sound quite right. Through this week's conversations I've decided to relinquish the little bit of control I was holding on to in regards to being cautious with the situation. If it happens, if this is a step towards something then it will eventually happen, if not, I've still got a good friend, though at this stage in life, good opposite gender friends aren't what I'm going for.

Platonic dating (n/v): weekly movie night, daily text message conversations, calls, exchanging of baking, waiting for bus at 12am, checking in/up on the person - ie. how's your day, whatcha doing, texting goodnight routinely, hugs etc.

Photo: http://www.flickr.com/photos/16954303@N08/1909471525/

We've got a problem...

I'm sleep deprived, like severely so, and I'm starting to think all weird. Now BI would say I always do and Ms. J would definitely agree, but after the sangria mishap and the texting and well everything of the last few days, like finding myself at a double movie showing until after midnight last night. But I realize it isn't a math equation, well at least not a simple one, we've got multi-variable Calculus going on here, and let's just say I failed that course...

It's fun, it's BI all over again, minus the who rest of the acronym - he's the marrying type - but not that that really matters. We're still stuck, we're tip toes away from the dating realm and yet I feel like we'll be miles away from a casual friendship or any kind of friendship if I push the issue. His roommate has supposedly touched on the issue, suggesting we should date and while a part of me would love to have her read on the whole thing given the duration of time they've lived together, I feel like that's crossing boundaries, and ya well... we are stuck, it's a stalemate. Any suggestions? I know it's not much to go on but I know it's not like a summation of it's parts business.

Oh and fingers crossed - AB bought a lottery ticket with my lucky quarter with the supposed intention of giving me a portion to purchase a laptop if we win - seems fair.

Photo: http://www.flickr.com/photos/neon_lobster/3572898908/